Help ... Can't stop

There is a hobby rapidly spinning out of control at my house. It started with a little 10 gallon fish tank. I bought it to give me peace after stressful days. I bought the cheap setup at Wal-Mart and away we went. A frog, a few tetras, a little catfish and 2 red Dwarf Gouramis found a home in my little tank.

And it did give me peace. All was working well ... a little too well.

My husband decided he needed some peace as well. But his fish of choice lovingly refered to as the "man-eaters," would not go in my community tank. So we bought a 29 gallon. Everything was fine until 2 of the man-eaters decided to pair up and make little man-eaters. This meant the rest of the man-eaters were no longer allowed in 90% of the tank, thanks to vicious pair hearding everyone away from their brood.

Enter a 2nd 10 gallon tank for the three evicted from the family tank.

Not to be outdone by my husband's 2 tanks. I find a good used 55 gallon tank and it moves into our living room. It was quickly populated with kissing gouramis, catfish, tetras, dwarf rainbows, red-tail sharks, snails and ghost shrimp.

By this time, I've been spending far too much time researching fish on the Internet. And that's how I discovered nano-reefs -- a small way to test the saltwaters as it were. Enter a 12 gallon show aquarium with live rock for the reef, a couple of turbo snails, a blood shrimp and a clownfish (I can't turn down the 7-year-old who's seen Nemo too many times.)

At that point 2 more of the man-eaters have decided to settle down and the single girl is no longer welcome which is where our sixth aquarium comes in.

"Hello, Aquariums Anonymous..."

Tour de Lance

I know it may seem strange for fat woman to be a bicycling fan, but I am. I have a red, white and blue Trek that is way out of my league. I love watching Lance. I adore the idea of the brash Texan taking the beloved Tour away from the French for a sixth time. But I must admit I am getting sick of one thing this race -- Sheryl Crow. I think I've seen more of her this week than I saw of Lance's former wife in the 5 years they were married. Attention fawning sportscasters: She's a singer, not a bicycling expert.

If I never see another beheading video or photo, it will be okay with me. In my job I see some of the worst things that human beings do to each other, but I never thought I would see the results of 2 decapitations.

Jury duty

On the back of my notice for jury duty this week was this exemption: Enrolled in a public of private of secondary schools.

My first thought was "Didn't anyone proof this?" My second thought was "I hate jury duty."

I didn't get picked. But I'm sure it would have been interesting hearing the case of "The neverending car alarm." Key the People's Court music.

Hmmmm
Why is it when a conversation starts with "I hope you take this how I mean it," you won't.

Right here in my neck of the woods ... er, desert
CNN.com - Student drinks lab chemical on a dare Since this story broke through my workplace, I won't comment. But I know what you're thinking.

Your pet what?
My Pet Fat is billed as a diet aid. I don't think I need to carry a blob of fat in my pocket -- considering I carry plenty of it on my belly, my hips, my thighs, my butt ... you get the picture.

Should have read the fine print
Was so excited by the new Blogger templates, I didn't save my settings. Now I have to restore my links, comments, site meter, etc. But after that, I really will have something to say ... er, write.

Lesson learned - Gun-safety presenter shoots self. And I can't believe I just hyphenated gun safety.

Love your music, but ...
If I ever find myself in New York and by some strange twist of fate Billy Joel offers me a ride, I'm say "Thanks, but no." Although I probably would ask for an autograph.

Camping with copy editors and an AME, a sports editor, a reporter, a baby, a spouse and a basset hound.

While it was a blast, some new rules will be instituted on future trips.

1. Never give a person who has been drinking a can of gas to help with firestarting.
2. Do not leave the basset hound puppy where the skunk walked through the night before.
3. 100 bottles of beer (that's a guestimate) + a bottle of wine / 7 adults - 1 teetotaler may not be good math.
4. The clumsy person who can't see in the dark should be escorted around all large rocks.
And the most important new rule
5. Here by known as the 'Vegas' rule -- What happens here, stays here.

No names have been used to protect the guilty. Okay, I'll 'fess up. I'm responsible for no. 2 and 4 and part of no. 5. And the rest of you know who you are and that I think you're swell.

Campaign 2004
Think you know where you stand in this election? Test how your views match with the candidates at AOL Presidential Match I wasn't surprised by my first match, but the second choice was a little unexpected.

Huh?
You know there is something wrong with corporate America when you find Ozzy next to Donny Osmond and Dead Kennedys next to Dido in your branch of the nationwide music chain.

A little off kilter
Due to a co-worker's vacation and a scheduling switcheroo, I am off for one day in the middle of the week. And I have no idea what to do with myself.
I went to the gym this morning in an effort to avoid the whole 'Person of Size' issue previously discussed. Went to lunch with the spouse. Surfed the Web. I'm running out of ideas. I could do housework but what kind of day off would that be. So I think I'll do a little more surfing, a lot of reading and probably throw in a little quality time at Starbucks. Carmel Macchiato -- nonfat of course.

Super saver means super slow

I have learned I am not a patient person and should just shell out the few bucks for quicker shipping. Super saver shipping took 10 days to go from Nevada to Texas.

But the package from Amazon.com was worth the wait though. The cookbook will get a review later -- after a grocery store run for some ingredients. Both books by Bill Walsh at The Slot were well worth the money. When I got my first job on copy desk, The Slot was one of the few real-world reference sites I found. If you are copy editor, get these books. If you are writer, you need them too. Your copy desk will thank you.

I'm not sure I like this comparison.
But I always like to pass a test.

You are the grammar Fuhrer. All bow to your
authority. You will crush all the inferior
people under the soles of your jackboots, and
any who question your motives will be
eliminated. Your punishment is being the bane
of every other person's existence, because
you're constantly contradicting stupidity.
Everyone will be gunning for you. Your dreams
of a master race of spellers and grammarians
frighten the masses. You must always watch your
back. If only your power could be used for good
instead of evil.


What is your grammar aptitude?
brought to you by Quizilla


Thanks to the bloggers of A Capital Idea and Punctuational for pointing me to the test.

Boom! Crash! Or how I spent my vacation.
So I'm out in the yard watching sweet child o' mine play when I see this car speed down our residential street. I remember thinking 'He's not going to stop.' And he didn't. Ran the stop sign, hit a very large welding truck almost knocking it over, bouncing off and running straight through my front yard into my house. Directly into my bedroom wall, behind which my husband was sleeping. It also went through the area where my child and a bunch of the neighborhood kids had gathered early. We were lucky. No one was hurt seriously. Although I did have the urge to injure the guy who ran the stop sign.

Who would have thought?

While I am not surprised that David Crosby had a gun and marijuana in his suitcase. I am a little surprised that a N.Y. hotel wouldn't look at the records to determine who stayed in the room last, before rifling through the bag for ID. And I am really surprised that they would turn him in after the employee found the items in question.

Slacker
An apology to the blogosphere. Once again, I've been busy and let time slip away from me.

Superiority complex
Is it wrong that I watch Newlyweds to feel better about myself? I may never be a skinny, blond popstar but I can tell the difference between "lair" and "liar." It's the little things.